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Gallery 4

April of 1996 was a very productive time for me and art came easy. Heavy Perm must be thanked once again for his challenging work photographing Darth Vader's Head on a Cake.

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Chatline adverts. The last chance of the desperately lonely, so long as they have a healthy bank balance. Or more likely, something that people ring up to sling the juice. Slinging the juice was definitely what I was doing when I sold this tatty piece of A4 paper to some art collector guy for four thousand pounds.

I should have held out for five.

Darth Vader's Head on a Cake

Much like my infamous cousin-crushing mint, Darth Vader's Head on a Cake is an essentially contradictory juxtaposition of opposed images. On the one hand, the sweet, tempting, delicious cake, which I mustn't eat, ooh no, it'll go straight on me waistline you mark my words. On the other there is the very epitome of cinematic evil, the Green Cross Code Man. Yet also we must remember that Vader is a child's concept of evil, (as Star Wars is essentially a children's film). Similarly, the cake is a childish concept of good food, whereas we adults know that a fresh salad is much better for us, especially with all the fertilizers and pesticides and crap that they have in them.

So what does it mean? How the hell should I know?

Hey Luke, who's yer Daddy?

Next time I'll be making up some more lies about things that I blatantly made in about 5 minutes in Paint Shop Pro.

Notice: Images contained in this page are the property of the author. You should not in any way copy or distribute these images. Original commisions for paintings and installations are undertaken for upwards of 1000 pounds sterling. Send requests by email.

Copyright 2001-2011 Tom Waters -

Bad Apple is not intended for readers under 18 years of age, the elderly and infirm, those of a nervous position, lizards, elks, or employees of Capita.